Causes of low sex drive

Why don’t people want sex sometimes? Specialists refer to 12 main causes of low libido. Let’s take the guesswork out of it.


Modern life causes stress – job, public transport, and home may trigger stress. Stress has a negative impact on sex drive. While sex helps to relax and reduce anxiety, you need to relieve stress first. There are many ways to relieve stress and everyone should choose the most optimal.

Relationship problems

Some couples experience sexual arousal after they have a fight but it’s the exception rather than the rule. Typically conflicts and fights are followed by misunderstandings and died feelings for each other, a couple do not have any attraction to each other. Of course, they can’t think of sex in such moments.

They need time and patience to solve their problem. The partners may want to speak frankly about their life, their relationships, make conclusions and understand what is wrong with them.

Sometimes the root of the problem is lack of quality time a couple spend together. In other cases, one of the partners doesn’t find another partner attractive anymore. Someone is not willing to regain a lost passion and want to give up on their relationship.


A small amount of alcohol may help you to relax and put you in the romantic mood. However, too much of alcohol is detrimental to your health and it won’t increase your sexual drive, that’s for sure.

Besides, drunk sex may be terrible leaving your partner feeling nothing but disgust. So, always know when to stop and if you can’t do it yourself, consult a specialist.

Lack of sleep

When at night, your eyes close because you are too tired, you can’t even think about sex. The need for sleep takes over because it is a greater priority for the body than sex.

When a person has sleep deficiency because he or she is too busy during the day and have many problems, then the issues with sex drive are easy to solve.

When a person suffers insomnia or some disease and can’t sleep well, then it is necessary to treat these conditions.


Couples with kids don’t prioritize sex and there are several reasons for it from lack of sleep and challenges of parenting to fatigue. While these problems are temporary, don’t wait until your kids will grow and try to find, at least, a couple of hours a week to be alone without children. You may leave them with their grannies, for example.


Some medications such as antidepressants, high blood pressure drugs or birth control pills can affect libido. Talk to your doctor, he or she may prescribe you alternative medications.

Low self-esteem

To feel sexually attractive and to want sex, you should like yourself and your body. You may be too confused to undress in front of your partner even if he or she loves everything about you. You may solve this problem in different ways – if possible, get rid of your flaws or embrace them. It is not easy but you can always ask a psychologist for help.

Excess weight

Obesity is not just a flaw, it is a dangerous health condition. Obesity is associated with a variety of diseases including high blood pressure. People suffer from low sex drive when they carry too much weight.

Besides, obese people don’t feel sexually attractive which also affects their sex drive and desire.

It is necessary to take measures and lose weight. For someone, high-intensity training may be helpful while others may need to completely change their lifestyle. It is in your power to restore beautiful body and sexual desire.

Erectile dysfunction

This is a male problem when they want but they can’t. In this case, men should seek medical advice and undergo treatment to be able to have sex.

Low testosterone level

Several external and internal factors affect testosterone production. Sometimes you can help yourself by changing your routine, eating a well-balanced diet, exercising regularly etc. Sex may also help you boost testosterone levels, just try and do it.


It is not just a bad mood that you can beat by eating your favorite treat or meeting with friends. It is a serious medical condition. The most frustrating consequence of depression is low sex drive. Antidepressants help to manage depression but choose those that do not lower libido.


Menopause causes various hormonal changes in the body of a woman that can lead to low libido and pain and bleeding during sex. This problem is easy to solve as there are special lubricants that help ease vaginal dryness and improve intercourse.